Turn conflicts into connection.
How many times have we as leaders landed in a conflict situation not seeing that the other person was hurt, frustrated, or needed help? We were totally absorbed by ourselves and our ego was shouting “How dare he/she”? Have we only barely managed the conflict or made it even bigger? Blinded by our ego we do not see it as a huge act of trust and are often not able to see the hidden potential of conflicts for creating connection.
“Every criticism, judgment, diagnosis, and expression of anger is the tragic expression of unmet needs.”
Why not use this great opportunity to share your needs, feelings and willingness to listen to others, empathize with them and try to think for the benefits of the people, company, family, society?
Who is our most difficult opponent? Our conditioned mind tries to protect us by pushing on proving being right and clever. Do not blame yourself for it as it is part of us, however take responsibility and actively work with it.
What is needed in this situation? Be present – take a deep breath, listen to the person as if your most respected person was in front of you, and silence your inner judge. Finally, say something only if your words bring added value for the person. And do not forget to say “THANK YOU THAT YOU CAME AND SHARE YOUR VIEW WITH ME”.
Try it out, it is simple but not easy:)